4 Thoughts for a BETTER Holiday Season

See that lovely picture down there? That’s my family around the fire pit. Cute, huh? You can’t see it but there’s a glass of wine in my hand. See my kids roasting Marshmallows before the sun has even set meaning we have not yet had dinner? (can I at least get some points for buying the healthiest and most expensive marshmallows available??) I think this scene repeated itself like 6 days in a row around Thanksgiving. My husband is in his four months of No work and I am still on the work schedule where he is constantly working and those little kids are just so ever-present… don’t they have anything better to do than to be underfoot all the time?!?!? Every afternoon, here we are in this perpetual feeling of Saturdays with fire pits and alcohol and sweet little faces asking if we can have just oooooonnnneee marshmallow pleeeeeease.

 Cry me a river, right? Pros and cons, friends…. Pros and cons…

Add in some Holiday fun and I am sure you can imagine what is happening to my midsection. I don’t have to imagine it. I am living it. I’m ok with it. This time of year has such a special feel around our house but it wasn’t always like this for us. It has taken several years of intentional actions, big conversations, and purposeful planning to get here. It’s required a willingness to let go of the reigns a bit and an intentional creation of a plan for getting them back in on the other side of it all.

 I used to dread this time of year. I’m so glad I’m not in that space anymore. It CAN be better. I’ve compiled a few Holiday thoughts to share, things that help me during the Holidays. Maybe you’ll find something to inspire your own family towards a BETTER Holiday Season

4 Thoughts for a BETTER Holiday Season

December Presence

Each year, our family sits down and makes a list titled December Presence. (Notice that play on words?) It’s a list of all the things each of us want to do and experience to make this month feel all the special feels. Each of us has our own little “It’s not Christmas if we don’t…” thing that solidifies the season in our hearts. Honoring each other by doing these things as a family connects us in shared activities and gives the gift of time, the most valuable gift of all. Working through our list centers us on the most meaningful ways to spend our time allowing us to let other festive opportunities pass us by without guilt.

Eat, Drink, and Be Merry

You can join some sort of Holiday Health Challenge if you want. Or you can just follow this sage advice: Don’t Eat Like An Asshole. While I do agree that we are surrounded by way too much food and most of it is crappy food, I still think it’s important to realize that celebration and food are very intimately tied together. A life without either wouldn’t be much of a life. The preparation of special recipes tenderly passed from one generation to the next… the mess of a child baking their first batch of cookies… the sharing of flavors and smiles… even the feeling of a slightly too full belly… It’s all special in a shared understanding that WE ARE SO BLESSED. Have some wine with people that you haven’t been able to hang out with all year. Bake a batch of your Grammy’s Special cookies. Sip some homemade hot chocolate with your kiddos. Try not to do it every single day. Use the best quality ingredients you can afford. Don’t waste calories on foods that aren’t actually special (think shitty cookies in the breakroom that you can buy any ole week at the grocery store). Make a plan to get life back on track at the start of the New Year (Check out our January Jumpstart over at Haka Fitness if you are local and need help with that). After all, it really IS the most wonderful time of the year!

Consider Your Consumption

It's the Holidays (duh!) and that means you have to start thinking about gift giving and all that mess.

Two years ago, as I was walking the aisles of a store looking desperately for anything to put in my cart so I could check people off and be done, I had some sort of weird existential mind warp experience. What the heck was I doing? I looked around at other people desperately doing the same thing with glazed eyes and not a smile to be seen. These gifts were meaningless! They were just a consumption fire of junk and I wasn't doing it. Not anymore!

Gifts are part of the deal, a way to honor people who have shared life with us. But maybe we could put more thought into the whole thing? This has required some gentle and loving conversations with grandparents to gently guide them towards meaningful and useful gifts. It has required talking to our kids about the role of plastic, trash, and mass consumption in the health of the Earth. It's also taken my own gentle self talks about being A-OK with only getting Legos and other great toys if they are hand me downs. We aren't perfect at it yet... but we're trying hard! These days we give special ingredients paired with special recipes, native plants that attract butterflies, or products that get the people we love outside together. I feel better about our purchases and I love that the people I love can enjoy them for a long time!

Spread Good Cheer

I don’t love everything about the Holidays. I don’t like to think of people being alone, of children going without, or of hearts aching for loved ones who aren’t here anymore. My magical holidays are such a special special gift to me. I can’t fix the problems of the world. But I can let my gratitude seep into my soul, pour out in my words, and show through my actions. As I have relaxed my own Holiday Season into something more manageable, I find I have more space to spread cheer. I FEEL happier about the deal and that lets me ACT happier. I have space to visit people who don’t get many visitors. I have extra smiles and joyful Christmas tunes that I can’t keep to myself. I also have some extra cash to share. Relaxing my own Holiday Season is THE BEST GIFT of all for the world at large.

This Holiday Season try to remind yourself that MORE isn’t better- more sweets, more parties, more gifts, more obligations….. BETTER is better. I hope your Holiday Season is BETTER.